Friday, March 2, 2012

He said, "Stop eating the bread of idleness"

God had been telling me something that I denied for a while, He said that I was being idle and He convicted me of it. Here's how. Each morning I would wake up around 8:30am, ok, no problem there, but when I would wake up, my kids would meet me full of energy. They had already been up for maybe half an hour or so, fed themselves and were ready for the day. On top of them having so much energy already at 8:30, I would still need another hour to feel awake myself. 

I am not a morning person and I truly need to wake up slowly and with silence. So I would attempt to quiet them, how shameful, I know.  I would feel terrible about waking up after them, but I couldn't do much about it, I was tired! Surely, going to bed at midnight was not conducive to early rising either.

The Lord would show me everyday that I was not performing well in my position that he had called me to. I was eating the bread of idleness in my lethargy. I hate to admit that I would sometimes skip the laundry, or the cleaning for the day, or whatever was needed to be done would be pushed aside because I had no vigor.

God continuously revealed to me that in being productive, I felt better. I accomplished more, I was happier, my kids were too, as mom had time and energy for them and best of all, I glorified Him. Awesome, except that was only in short spurts and sometimes, I didn't even experience that everyday.

God spoke to and convicted me about the person I was displaying, in comparison to the person He saw in me and wanted me to be. The woman looked like the one described in Proverbs 31. I read Proverbs 31 over and over again. What stood out to me was that the Proverbs 31 woman was capable of doing all the things she did because she was not idle! It was a breath of fresh air to know that God saw me as, and wanted to me to be, that woman. 

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